HE PICKS.YOU FADE.

The Man. The Mush. The Legend.

Brian “Titts” Staley's gambling career peaked on May 3, 2008.

Unfortunately, nobody told him.

That day, Titts walked into the Kentucky Derby armed with $5,000 he didn't actually have — courtesy of one of those credit-card convenience checks that responsible adults normally throw directly into the garbage.

Instead, Titts cashed it.

And then something terrible happened.

He won.

Titts hit the Superfecta and walked out of Churchill Downs with approximately $64,000. For most people, this would have been an incredible financial windfall.

For Titts, it was the beginning of the end.

Because that $64,000 didn't just give him money.

It gave him confidence.

Suddenly, the same man whose Division III JV basketball coach once told him he couldn't shoot believed he had also cracked the code to gambling.

He hadn't.

In fact, as far as his friends can tell, Titts hasn't won money gambling since.

That was 2008.

The years since have been a breathtaking display of bad beats, terrible picks, questionable logic, shattered parlays and an almost supernatural ability to make the wrong side of a game look attractive.

His friends began calling him The Mush. The Black Cat. The Cooler.

If Titts announced that he had the same bet as you, there were only two reasonable responses: change your bet or “PUT HIM IN THE BATHROOM!”

Titts doesn't avoid bad luck. He seeks it out. He walks under ladders. He breaks mirrors. He spills salt and leaves it there. Black cats cross the street to avoid him.

Eventually, his friends discovered something remarkable:

Titts didn't need to become a better gambler.

Everyone else just needed to bet the opposite.

And thus, FadeTitts was born.

His longtime friend Brian Schultz finally decided that keeping this information within a small circle of friends was selfish. If one man's astonishing inability to pick winners could help others, then perhaps all those losing tickets weren't meaningless after all.

They were research.

So welcome to FadeTitts.

He picks. You fade.

And somewhere out there, the ghost of the 2008 Kentucky Derby continues whispering the four most dangerous words Titts ever heard:

“I figured this out.”

This page is affectionate friend-group satire. Gambling outcomes are unpredictable; historical jokes are not a betting system.